Food is a good thing and know one can deny that truth. When sharing my struggles with others, often I have heard “It’s just food, get over it.” Now I know that their intentions were good and said out of a pure heart, but I also know that these certain people are ignorant because they have not personally struggled with food as an addiction. I say that in a nice way, especially because i did this in my own ignorance for fifteen years and it has been a constant working out on my part to change those habitual unhealthy habits along with how I personally view food. For someone like me who at the end of those fifteen years was just acknowledging my strongholds when it came to food, I could take innocent comments like that and pursue good things like food in the wrong way, at the wrong time, or with the wrong person. It is never my intention to offend anyone in my writings, nor do expect everyone to understand what may be just food to others, is a self-medicating drug that is easily, acceptable, everywhere and is easily done in secret without anyone being wise to it. I know because I hid it from everyone who knew me, loved me or thought they new me for fifteen years. Talk about deception and darkness that I lived in. Now I live in the light where I am no longer ignorant and it is my desire to help those and encourage those who may be deep into the pit that I once was and is looking and listening for a way of escape. It is my purpose to reach those that are like-minded to encourage and inspire that there is a light at the end of the tunnel and I am living proof.
For the longest time, three years exactly after searching for freedom over my battle with bulimia, it was never talked about openly especially within the church. Now we can point fingers at obvious sins when it comes to gluttonous behavior like taking something that is good like alcohol, sex, drugs that help heal, money, internet, social networking, you name it, but food has been acceptable especially if a person does not show the tell tale signs of maybe being overweight, obesity, lacking self-control or undisciplined in how we treat our bodies because the evidence isn’t always visible. SO let me give you an example of someone I highly respect and love to listen to this persons council. This person said I am ready to be with my Savior and be done with this life, so bring on the fat, high cholesterol, doughnuts, cakes, pies, sugary foods. Now I could take a message like this and spiral down a slippery sloap and turn to those things that I know during my weak moments turn into a backward battle when I am trying to move forward. That is why it is so important that we do not take everything others say to heart or a truth to our lives. Everyone’s war they wage are different and I have come to learn that I cannot take everyone at there word and it is good to agree to disagree. This person has never struggled with food as a substance to self-medicate on a daily basis so how could I expect him to know the hurts of my heart and to understand. I can’t, but something I can say is that “I am what I am by the Grace of God and He is the one I follow and because He knows me best, then He is the one I should be most concerned with listening to as should any of us. We all have gifts differing from one another, but that does not make any of what we do or others of less value. I know that what I have gone though personally that God is using for good in others lives, not everyone’s and that is ok. He plants us where he wants us and that needs to be our focus so our value stays where it belongs.